The Long Ride Home

The car was packed. The door was locked. Goodbyes were said. I hit the play button on my iPod and hit the road. I left Messiah with my belongings and four years of memories. The soundtrack for my journey was a playlist I like to call "The Weepies & Friends", which I made for Corrie a little bit ago and have been listening to lately. With each song, I realized that it was lyrically the perfect mix for this particular trip.

1. "Run" by Addison Road
This song was playing as I drove down College Avenue, past cemetery hill, toward Lisburn Road. I could feel tears coming and it was suddenly difficult to sing along. The tears never flowed, but with this song I think I realized that this was goodbye.

Stoplights, breakdown, we cry, last try
Worlds collide, time to decide
Where you want to go in this great big world
Where you want to go in this great big world
Stuck here too long in this sad song
Lost on a street, everyone has
Vanished and you're all alone
But you don't know where to go
Yeah you're all alone
And you want to go home

Run just as fast as you can
Run, 'til you reach the end
Where the fallen finally land
And your world starts over again
Run

Next page, new day, finding my way
Stumble upon the strength to move on
I am not alone in this great big world
And you are not alone in this great big world

You're free, free falling
A new beginning
This is our time

2. "Keep It There" by The Weepies

I came down on a bottle rocket
Found my heart right where I locked it
Last night like rain on chalk
It's gone like money in my pocket

All my troubles in the rear view mirror, I know, I know
All my troubles in the rear view mirror, I know, I know
I got, I got, I got to keep them there

3. "Hologram" by Katie Herzig

Time is ticking so fast
Does anything last
Soon I will be just a part of your past
I'll leave you with this
You hold on in blissful memories

4. "Rainy Weather Friend" by David Mead

All of these rusting souvenirs
I know you've always had a good heart
Whatever tales you'd lend an ear

5. "If I Ever" by Alli Rogers

I don’t have words to tell you how I’m feeling
I don’t think any language can
At times like these silence is appealing
Somehow I know you understand

And if I ever lose my hearing
If I ever lose my sight
If all my five senses leave
I know we’d be alright
Cause it seems your heart is a part of mine

So this is how it feels to be breathless
When someone walks out of the room
Stay by me, we can be timeless
Less than forever is too soon

6. "In No Time at All" by Article One

In no time at all the world could fall to pieces
In no time at all our lives could come apart
We never know where life will take us

7. "I Want to Belong to You" by Katie Herzig

I’ll stay right where I am
‘Til you come back
Don’t let me lose you
Before there’s a chance to begin

Suddenly light on my feet
With a sweet rearrange of the day
Everything’s changing

One quick exchange
It’s not the same
Kind of goodbye
Gone with a sigh

8. "Simple Life" by The Weepies

And everyday since I've found you
Such moments we steal
Like little thieves, we rub our hands
We hold our hearts between them.

Move on, move on
Time is accelerating.

9. "Twenty Girls Ago" by David Mead
Okay, so this one I couldn't really connect to the lyrics directly. But there's a general theme of reminiscing and time passing that seemed relevant.

1o. "Wish You Well" by Katie Herzig

I want to wish you well
I didn’t watch you go
Cause I suppose I don’t know how
I will remember you
Not the way you left but how you lived
And what you knew

11. "Coming Back to You" by Seth Kallen & The Reaction
Honestly, I didn't include this song in the playlist for its lyrics. I chose it mostly because of the sweet banjo solo in the middle, and because I went to high school with the drummer.

But I'm coming back
I'm always coming back to you

12. "Hard Times" by Eastmountainsouth

Let us pause in life's pleasures and count its many tears
While we all sup sorrow with the poor
There's a song that will linger forever in our ears
Oh, hard times come again no more

13. "Long Ride Home" by Patty Griffin

I've had some time to think about you
And watch the sun set like a stone
I've had some time to think about you
On the long ride home

14. "Hope" by Alli Rogers

Hope, I'll be waiting, I'll be holding on to...
I am never knowing, so I'll be holding on to hope

15. "My Sweet Darling" by Seth Kallen, featuring Melody Gardot

I know that fairy tales are always ending
You know that this world is meant for mending

16. "Reverie" by Randall Goodgame
My friends have loved me in so many ways over the past four years.

When I'm lost, she finds me
When I'm all tied up, she unwinds me
When I forget my name, she reminds me

17. "Spell" by Marie Digby
Just a generally beautiful song that is worth a listen.

18. "Hope Now" by Addison Road

When my life is like a storm
Rising waters all I want is the shore
You say I'll be ok and
Make it through the rain
You are my shelter from the storm

Everything rides on hope now
Everything rides on faith somehow

I have yet to have an emotional breakdown that lasts longer than a few beats or measures. I wonder if I am just coping extremely well with this change, or if I have not yet realized what has happened.