"By the Grace of God I Am What I Am"

This is a long overdue post that I meant to write on November 30, when I was reading Oswald Chambers' "My Utmost for His Highest." And by write, I mean tell you all the great things that Oswald Chambers has to say.

"By the grace of God I am what I am, and His grace toward me was not in vain..." - 1 Corinthians 15:10"

The way we continually talk about our own inabilities is an insult to our Creator. To complain over our incompetence is to accuse God falsely of having overlooked us. [...] Never worry about whether what you say sounds humble before others or not. But always be humble before God, and allow Him to be your all in all. There is only one relationship that really matters, and that is your personal relationship to your personal Redeemer and Lord. If you maintain that at all costs, letting everything else go, God will fulfill His purpose through your life. One individual life may be of priceless value to God's purposes, and yours may be that life.

We complain about our incompetency as much as we acknowledge our imperfection, all in an attempt to achieve some sense of humility. I think, though, that we forget that the standard for perfection is different from the standard for competency. God created perfection; God is perfection. Compared to Jesus' example, we all fall short. We are imperfect. Competency is world-created, based on the people in our lives and in this world who seem to do certain things particularly well. We strive to meet their standard and complain when we do not reach it, but perhaps not all standards of competency are ours to meet.

Glee Episode #8: Mash-up

Word of the Day: Popularity. In "Mash-Up", Finn and Quinn struggle with popularity, trying to figure out how to regain social status and whether or not it really matters. Or rather, trying to figure out what matters. This week, I'm changing things a bit in my blog. There were too many good quotes to comment only on the popularity-related ones.

"My weave!" - Mercedes
I laugh out loud every time I hear this line. Part of it is the delivery. The other part is my new understanding of Black hair thanks to Chris Rock promoting Good Hair on Oprah.

"Now that you've joined Lullaby Lees and sperminated the queen of the Chastity Ball and dropped below us hockey dudes on the food chain, it's open season." - Karovsky
It's interesting how people think that having sex makes you cool. At the same time, though, teen pregnancy - one consequence of having sex in high school, can cripple a couple's social status. And now that Finn and Quinn have lost status in the eyes of their peers, the hockey dudes finally find themselves as predators in the food chain. I like to think that there is something good in humanity that allows us to empathize with our fellow prey, but Karovsky proves that is not always true.

Emma: Yes, and Ken has convinced me that we need to at least be in the same room when the marriage is certified.
Ken: What can I say, I'm a traditionalist.
No Ken, you're just normal and the only person in the relationship who actually wants to get married.

"This is a disaster. Our reputation as McKinley High's 'it' couple is in serious jeopardy if we don't find some way to be cool again, Finn." - Quinn
The head cheerleader/football star combination is always the 'it' couple in high school. At my school, there was Craig and Ashleigh. I wasn't friends with them or part of their crowd, so I don't know how hard they tried to maintain their status. I don't know if they felt their popularity was ever threatened. I do know that considering social status as most important turns something small like a slushee facial into a major disaster.

"There's an important lesson to be learned with mash-ups. Sometimes things are so different they don't feel like they go together. But the big difference between them is what makes them great. Like chocolate and bacon." - Will
I enjoy a good mash-up, not just musically but also metaphorically. It's like life, the way things come together and result in unexpected greatness. But I'm hesitant about chocolate and bacon. I'm tempted to try it and experience the big difference that makes it great.

"Status is like currency. When your bank account is full, you can get away with doing just about anything." - Quinn
Money is currency. And when your bank account is full, you can get away with a lot then, too. Just ask all the celebrities who face no consequences for their offenses.

Finn: Totally! It's like you can't see their eyes, so they have all the power. I could be looking at your boobs and you'd have no idea.
Emma: Um, no - kids, look. The most important thing is that you be yourselves. Ok? So if people don't like you for that, I'm sorry but who needs them?
1. It kinda creeps me out when I can't see someone's eyes through their sunglasses. And I am not surprised that Finn would take advantage of that and look at someone's boobs.
2. Why is it so hard for people to be themselves? Is it the fear of rejection and judgment? I say that if people don't like you for yourself, you don't need their judgment. You don't need to go out of your way to be what they want. But it doesn't mean you don't need them as a person since everyone has something to offer, and it doesn't mean you should refuse to accept them for who they are.

"She didn't wear it to her dance rehearsals, and the night of the wedding her husband kept stepping on the train. It was really bad. The fight was epic. The priest cried. They were divorced three months later. Actually, maybe I shouldn't wear it." - Emma
I guess Emma is hoping a bad dance will be her ticket out.

"I know. It's whack. But I also remember what my history teacher told us last semester. Only Nixon can go to China. I have no idea what she meant, but it reminded me of when my family ordered Chinese food and sat down together for our traditional Simchas Torah screening of Schindler's List." - Puck
I missed the first half of this quote during the original broadcast of the episode because I was squealing too loudly and jumping up and down.

Puck: Are you questioning my badassness? Have you seen my guns?
Rachel: No. I'm sorry, but - your arms are lovely. But I just don't see us working out.
Yes, his arms are lovely. And I will justify my crush on Puck with the fact that the actor, Mark Salling, is really 27. It's like how everyone roots for Josie and Mr. Coulson to get together when they watch Never Been Kissed. It's creepy that the teacher is flirting with a student who is supposed to be 17, but we think it's okay because (dramatic irony!) we know she's really 25.

"There's nothing wrong with wanting to be popular. It just means you want people to like you. I think that's healthy." - Finn
I don't think there's anything wrong with wanting friends. Friendship is healthy; changing who you are in order to form many surface-level relationships is not. There's a difference between wanting to be liked and denying your true self to achieve that. There are people who are truly popular, who always act like themselves and have many friends. Those are the people who make me jealous. Not the stereotypical "cool" people whose friendships people use to climb the social ladder.

I hear people say, 'That's not how I define marriage.' Well to them I say, 'Love knows no bounds.' Why can't people marry dogs? I'm certainly not advocating intimacy with your pets. I for one think intimacy has no place in a marriage. I walked in on my parents once, and it was like seeing two walruses wrestling. So 'Woof!' on Prop 15, Ohio. And that's how Sue "C's" it." - Sue
I find this more amusing than I should, probably because I just watched Jane Lynch in Best in Show, about dog competitions. And I'm about to finish my first week working for a company that produces dog grooming expos and magazines for dog groomers.

"Your commitment to football is about as long as your pants." - Will
I was just thinking about Ken's short shorts. Isn't it supposed to be cold in Ohio?

"You and I and the whole world knows that I am just a consolation prize. How do you think that makes me feel? ... Emma is settling for me, and I love her so much I don't care. But it doesn't mean I appreciate you coming with your Gene Kelly charm and getting high off of her fawning over you." - Ken
I feel such sympathy, and sometimes empathy, for Ken. He's really a good guy, so why doesn't Emma see that?

Puck: No one deserves this feeling. You know what the worst part is? It's not the burning in your eyes or the way the slushee drips all the way into your underpants. It's the humiliation. I feel like I could burst into tears at any moment. Rachel, I'm sorry, but today when the clock strikes 3:30...
Rachel: You're choosing football over glee, which means we probably can't be together anymore.
Puck: Yes. Damn, I feel like such a bad Jew.
This scene (the whole episode, really) continued to melt my heart for Mr. Noah Puckerman. The sensitivity, the understanding, the vulnerability... *swoon* But my favorite part was at the end when he whipped a yarmulke out of his pocket.

Rachel: Are you sure about this, Noah? I mean, choosing us over the team means you might get a slushie in your face every day.
Puck: Bring it.
Artie: Where's Finn?
Oh, Noah Puckerman. Such bravery and maturity in risking the humiliation that makes him want to cry. And Artie. The delivery of his line was subtly brilliant. It carried the perfect amount of sadness and naivete, like a kid eating steak, wondering where his pet Bessie could be.

Finn: If I don't do it, the guys on the team are going to kick the crap out of me.
Kurt: Well we can't have that, can we?
Finn: What are you doing?
Kurt: It's called taking one for the team. Now get out of here! And take some time to think whether or not any of your friends on the football team would have done that for you... Someone get me to a day spa, stat!
Kurt, this is why everyone loves you. Such a good lesson about friendship.

Rod: You didn't think that we were exclusive, did you?
Sue: That's the only way I do it, Rod.
For some reason, I wouldn't expect this of Sue. But I suppose if Sue wants something, she has to be the only one who gets it.

Will: These are the moments, Finn. The crossroads. The ones you look back on when you get old and think, 'What if'.
Finn: I don't buy that. I don't think any one decision makes your life. Unless you accidentally invent some kind of zombie virus or something.
Will: No, you're right. Life's a series of choices. A combination of moments. Little ones that add up to big ones that create who you are.
In high school, I used to put too much emphasis on the weight my decisions had on my future. I stressed out about choosing classes and whether or not I could get a job if I took art in 9th grade instead of Spanish. But every moment is a part of who you are, whether it's something life-changing or mundane. Unfortunately, I missed the poignancy of this scene when watching it on TV, because we were viewing it on a standard definition screen. On the wide shots, both Will and Finn were off the screen. We could hear the voices but could only see the goal post.

"If it is one minute late, I will go to the animal shelter and get you a kitty cat. I will let you fall in love with that kitty cat, and then on some dark cold night I will steal away into your home and punch you in the face." - Sue
EPIC.

Will: I just can't get those two songs to go together.
Emma: Yeah, it's because they don't. We both know that. They're both good songs, though.
Will: Great ones.
If Emma could only see the value of the "Thong Song", then maybe they could make it work! Try harder to make it work, Will.

Rachel: They're delicious.
Kurt: And filled with empty calories. You know why they're called slushees, don't you? Because your butt looks like one if you have too many of them.
You are what you eat, I suppose.

"You've never been hit by a slushee before, Mr. Schue?" - Artie
The best part about this line is the way Artie slowly rolls his wheelchair toward Will as he speaks.

Glee Episode #7: Throwdown

Word of the Day: Power. It's amazing what people will do to gain or regain power and how some people are naturally powerful. It is also interesting to see what people do with the power they have, whether they use it for good or "evil". Do they become a super hero or a super villain? I also enjoyed this episode's look at the minority group in the midst of the power struggle over glee club.

"It sucks. You get all the stress and the worry, and none of the control." - Finn
I suppose depending on your beliefs about the world, all of life is like this. In the grand scheme of things, we have very little or no control over what happens. The only thing we really have control over is ourselves and the decisions we make. We can choose to react to the world without the stress and the worry, even though everything else is out of our hands.

"Santana. Wheels. Gay kid. C'mon, move it! Asian. Other Asian. Aretha. Shaft." - Sue
We've grown to expect this kind of insensitivity from Sue, but it still catches me off guard. I guess I would like to think that no one would be this insensitive. Yet I laughed. Maybe it's because it reminded me of a personal incident when a professor asked the class to discuss what we liked best about being white. He turned to me and seeing my confused expression said, "Or fill-in-the-blank. There's only two of you." He didn't even say Asian. Or other Asian. Fill-in-the-blank. Oh man, was I angry. After a while, though, I was able to see the comment for the ridiculousness and awkwardness that it was.

"I'm all about empowerment. I empower my Cheerios to live in a state of constant fear by creating an environment of irrational random terror." - Sue
Sue is the kind of person who does not use her power for good. She's also the kind of person who doesn't understand empowerment. The root of empowerment is overpowering fear, stirring up within you the strength to achieve. Empowerment is not about instilling more fear.

"You can't stand to see a woman in a position of power. Your psychosexual derangement would be fascinating if it weren't so terrifying!" - Sue
Will doesn't have a problem with women in positions of power. If he did, I don't think he would try so hard to get all of his students, male and female, to succeed in school. No, his problem is that almost all of the women in his life are emasculating him. Do I think that being a man means having dominance over women? No, not entirely. But it is his inability to defend himself, to go from being abused by Sue at school to being abused at home by Terri ("I just don't want to feel as powerless in my home as I do at school."), that threatens his manhood.

"Here's the deal Wu. My husband does the taxes for some very powerful mid-sized law firms in this town, and I'm sure somebody will be more than happy to take on my lawsuit." - Kendra
Because there's nothing more powerful than a mid-sized law firm. In a small town. With two OB/GYNs. Who are both Asian?

Finn: If we wanted to hear Mom and Dad fight, those of us who still have two parents would just stay at home on pay day.
Mercedes: I agree. Glee is supposed to be fun. And furthermore, I don't like this minority business. I may be a strong, proud, Black woman, but I'm a lot more than that.
1. Loved Finn's line and the perspective he offers.
2. I'm really glad that Mercedes acknowledges that her identity goes beyond race. I think race and ethnicity are important parts of one's identity, but sometimes people fail to see anything else in themselves. I have encountered people who are so centered around their racial identity that they have developed a negative attitude toward the world, because in their eyes everyone is probably "ignorant" or "racist". They have probably spent so much time self-segregating that they fail to see the common ground that we all share.

Glee Episode #6: Vitamin D

Word of the Day: Competition. It happens when two parties want the same thing, and sharing is not an option. One trophy. One job. One man. Sometimes competition is real, and sometimes it is only perceived.

Will: Competition. Every one of these people or elements was a champion in their own right. But they use competing with each other to make themselves even better.
Kurt: I don't understand how lightning is in competition with an above-ground swimming pool.
Those who have a good understanding of competition are the ones who become better. They realize that the focus is on becoming better than they were before. Those who are overcome by competition only focus on being better than others. As for the lightning, I'm pretty sure it always trumps swimming pool. Every other time, the pool's just lucky.

"A mashup is when you take two songs and mash them together to make an even richer explosion of musical expression." - Will
A mashup is a good metaphor for the positive spirit of competition. Two songs come together but do not destroy the other in order to emerge as the dominant sound. Rather, what results is something beautiful and each song is better than before. For some good mashups, check out Norwegian Recycling on YouTube.

"Every time I try to destroy that clutch of scab-eating mouth breathers, it only comes back stronger like some sexually ambiguous horror movie villain." - Sue
Sue is one of those people who doesn't understand the spirit of healthy competition. She finds success by destroying others rather than bettering herself. Glee on the other hand, come back stronger because Sue's attacks don't expose weaknesses but rather give them opportunities for improvement.

"Don't bend or break, baby, don't back down." - Bon Jovi
Persistance wins competitions. I knew Bon Jovi was wise.

Rachel: I know everyone expects us to be enemies and be in competition, but I don't hate you.
Quinn: Why not? I've been awful to you.
Rachel: That was before you knew what it felt like to be me. An outsider.
Competition isn't always real. I think that's when it can be the most damaging, because you are unnecessarily focused on an imaginary prize. You take others down, even if they are not standing in your way. I've found myself in competition with others, though they were unaware of it. I lost a friendship because I saw my friend as an enemy instead. It wasn't until I realized we were on the same side that we became friends again. (Truth is, there was an unexpected third party. My friend and I rekindled our relationship when we realized we both lost, and we understood what it was like to be the other person.)

"I know you have this thing about being clean. Now I can't promise to pick up my underwear or squeegee the shower door, but I can promise to keep you life clean of sadness and loneliness and any other dark clouds that might float into it." - Ken
This doesn't have anything to do with the theme of competition, but I gotta say, who can compete with this speech?! Ken is probably one of the more sensible adults on the show, as much as I may hate to admit that. And though I'm a female, I think I am most similar to Ken out of all the characters.

"You might think there's some kind of competition going on between you and I, but that's like saying a nail is competing with a hammer." - Terri
I've been on the receiving end of this statement before, though at the time, I was also the one saying the words. During my imaginary competition, I always saw myself as the nail and my friend as the hammer. I wanted to win so badly but kept telling myself that I never had a chance. Sure, the nail could put up a good fight, but there was no way the nail could beat the hammer. I realize now that I was my own hammer and could never win against my negative thinking.

I guess I get caught up in the competitive hysteria too. My goals are too selfish. It's time for me to stop competing against everyone and start competing alongside them.
It's like a mashup. Instead of trying to destroy others, how can you work with them to create something even better?

Glee Episode #5: The Rhodes Not Taken

Word of the Day: Why. It is probably the most important question we can ask of ourselves. Honest answers to the question "Why?" give us a better glimpse of who a person is and who we are. "Why" shows us what motivates a person or what is considered important. The answer doesn't always come right away - if we want the real answer. That's probably why it takes a whole episode for the characters to understand their reasons why.

"We have obligations as teachers to give kids opportunities for growth and enrichment." - Emma
If only all teachers acknowledged this obligation as their reason for teaching. There are too many teachers who focus on the salary (however much or little) over the students. The best teachers out there are the ones who make you better people, not better test takers. They're the ones who teach you about life and academics, and help you to realize your full potential.

"If Glee's gonna win, I need to give her a second chance. She is a talented performer, and I really think that the kids are going to learn a lot of valuable technique from her." - Will
Will has a couple reasons for keeping April around, both seemingly focused on his students. His first reason is to help April and allow her to achieve what she was 3 credits short from achieving. His second reason is to help his current students become better singers and performers. At the root of it all, though, is Will's desire for Glee to win and reclaim his glory days.

"You need to think about why you're doing this and what you're willing to sacrifice to get it." - Emma
Not only should you think about what you're willing to sacrifice, but you should also consider whether "this" is even worth the sacrifice. And is the "why" worth the sacrifice, too? Is the businessman willing to sacrifice family time to get the promotion just because he wants prestige at work? Am I willing to sacrifice a couple homework-less years of my life to get my Master's degree in order to pursue my desire to work with college students? Is Will willing to sacrifice the integrity and innocence of his students in exchange for April Rhodes just so Glee can succeed?

"I just know that I want to spend more time with you now." - Finn
Goodness, who knows how many times this has been my reason why...

Kurt: Maybe Quinn is lactose intolerant.
Artie: That doesn't explain all the crying.
Tina: Maybe she just doesn't like the group.
No amount of speculation about the "why" behind Quinn's recent behavior can replace Quinn's personal obligation to face the truth.

"I need to get a music scholarship so I can go to college, so I can get a good job, so I can take care of my kid. And I can't do that if you don't come back to glee club." - Finn
I remember the idea of college driving my decisions, even down to the courses I studied in junior high. I needed to take the right classes so I could get into a good school, so I could get a good job. But that's all. Finn's motivation is much weightier and goes beyond just having a good job. He wants a good life, something that college can provide.

"I realized being a star didn't make me feel as special as being your friend. If I let you down when you needed me the most, I'd never forgive myself." - Rachel
Rachel said in the pilot episode that "being a part of something special makes you special". She thought that "something special" was glee club, but now she realizes it's the friendship she has with the glee kids. The relationships we form are often the strongest reasons why we do anything.

Glee Episode #4: Preggers

Word of the Day (not so much a recurring word, but a theme): Honesty. In this episode, the characters don't talk about honesty, but instead demonstrate how difficult it is. Though lying and deceit seem so much easier, they only complicate matters in the long run. Honesty will win eventually, and some of the characters realize how much better life is when lived honestly.

Kendra: What do you think he's going to do when he finds out you lied?
Terri: Oh God, I don't know. I've got to tell him the truth. I've got to tell him and I've got to deal with the consequences.
Kendra: Are you insane? Dishonesty is food to a marriage. It will die without it.
It gives me hope that Terri has some sense of morality. She recognizes that the right thing to do is be honest with her husband, though there are consequences for her lies and she may run the risk of losing him. I lose a bit of hope in Terri (and humanity) to see people like her sister Kendra, who think that dishonesty can do anything positive for a marriage, let alone sustain it. Dishonesty is what kills marriages and relationships (though Kendra probably uses it to trick her husband into staying married). Successful relationships, whether a marriage or a friendship, have a foundation of honesty. I can say from experience that the vulnerability required to be honest with someone is very difficult, but it allowed me (and the relationship) to emerge from that moment stronger than before.

Kurt: Finn, I needed to ask you something.
Finn: Thanks, but I already have a date to the prom. But I'm flattered. I know how important dances are to teen gays.
Kurt: I'm not gay.
Finn: Oh.
The ability to be honest is based on trust. You have to trust the other person not to hurt you in that moment of vulnerability. Glee has allowed Kurt and Finn to develop trust in one another, but the social mechanics of high school carry an inherent distrust between classes. Kurt has yet to build enough trust in Finn to be honest about his sexuality, though after this episode that might change.

Sandy: It is so wonderful to finally have some Sandy time. I have my bridge game on Fridays, Saturdays I am fully committed to the local cat rescue...
Sue: Sandy, let's cut the crap.
Sandy: *sobs* I'm living in a cocoon of horror. Yesterday, I ate nine cans of aerosol whipped cream.
It can be hard to admit the truth, especially if it is somewhat shameful. But being honest with yourself is the key to moving forward. Others cannot help or comfort you until you can be honest with yourself.

"I hear this poor girl is so ashamed that she can't tell anybody. Can you imagine having to hide something like that? All that effort covering that up?" - Will
It takes more muscles to frown than to smile. In the same way, it takes more work to maintain a lie than to confess the truth. When will Will realize how much effort Terri is putting into covering up her own mess?

"I'm just somebody who wants to help." - Terri
Half-hearted promises of benevolence can be some of the most damaging lies, because they lead people to develop trust in those they shouldn't trust. These are the kind of lies that lure children into shady vans and trap people in toxic relationships.

Kurt: I have something that I want to say. I'm glad that you're proud of me, but I don't want to lie anymore. Being a part of the glee club and football has really showed me that I can be anything, and what I am is... I'm gay.
Kurt's Dad: I know.
Kurt: Really?
KD: I've known since you were three. All you wanted for your birthday was a pair of sensible heels. I guess I'm not totally in love with the idea, but if that's who you are, there's nothing I can do about it. And I love you just as much. Thanks for telling me, Kurt. You're sure, right?
Kurt: Yeah, Dad. I'm sure.
KD: Just checking.
When a child is different from the parents' hopes or expectations, it can be hard for the parents to accept their child's decision. Not all parents are so accepting as Kurt's dad, whether the matter at hand is careers or sexuality. It was so heartwarming to watch the conversation between Kurt and his dad, to see the unconditional love the father had for his son. My favorite part of the conversation was when Kurt's dad thanked him for coming out to him, because his sexuality wasn't really a secret. The conversation was more so a demonstration of Kurt's trust in his own father.

"To them I say, shake it up a bit. Get out of your box! Even if that box happens to be where you are living... It's not easy to break out of your comfort zone. People will tear you down, tell you you shouldn't have bothered in the first place, but let me tell you something. There's not much difference between a stadium of cheering fans and an angry crowd screaming abuse at you. They're both just making a lot of noise. How you take it is up to you. Convince yourself they're cheering for you. You do that, and someday they will." - Sue
This doesn't have anything to do with honesty... Normally, everything Sue says is offensive to some people group and can be ignored, but I understand what she says here. Perspective has a way of changing the negative to positive. And Sue Sylvester quotes can be more meaningful when you omit the bit about how homeless people should try not being homeless for a change.

Glee Episode #3: Acafellas

Words of the day: Guts and confidence. Some people lack one or the other, and the lucky ones are blessed with both. At times, a boost in confidence gives you the guts to do what you never thought you could. At other times, it takes guts to show just how confident you can be.

"Being a man is all about one thing: guts." - Will's dad
Perhaps guts really is what separates the boys from the men. When I say "guts", I don't mean jumping off a bridge, even if you might break some bones (or worse). A boy will do whatever people say without fear of consequences, but that is not "guts." That's idiocy. "Guts," according to the dictionary, is having courage when it really matters. A man will act in spite of what others may say or the personal consequences he faces, because he wants to follow his heart or do something that matters. Of course, "guts" is not gender exclusive; for girls, though, I'd venture to say the bridge is probably more metaphorical.

"They say it takes more certainty than talent to be a star. I mean, look at John Stamos." - Emma
Don't knock John Stamos (Uncle Jesse forever!), but Emma has a point. Talentless celebrities like Paris Hilton or Heidi Montag (or any other reality TV star transitioning into acting or music) demonstrate how it doesn't take talent these days to be famous. But if they're certain in themselves enough to get out there, I guess there's no stopping them. Talent will get them further than the limited success that these "stars" experience.

"He knows who he is, and that's great. And there really is nothing sexier in a man than confidence." - Emma
It's true. Guys who are comfortable in their own skin seem more attractive, even if they are not the most physically appealing. It's like how a salesperson is more effective if they are confident in their product - why would anyone else want to buy it if the salesperson doesn't even believe in it?

"Two weeks ago, I would have agreed that four grown men rehearsing a capella hip-hop in my living room was embarrassing. But busting out some white hot new jack swing - I'll tell you, I've never felt more confident." - Will

"Seeing me feel so good about myself made my wife more attracted to me in every way." - Will

"Of course he doesn't want anything to do with us after you kicked him in the nads... He just doesn't have the confidence to coach us anymore. Guys are really sensitive when it comes to this kind of stuff." - Finn
I tend to forget that guys can be sensitive. Being sensitive isn't a stereotypically "manly" quality, but I suppose if there's anything for a guy to be sensitive about, it would be his manliness. Many guys try to put up a facade of strength, and any suggestion of weakness would be enough to strip away their confidence.

"Is this one of those chick things where you're pissed about one thing but you're just pretending like you're pissed about something else?" - Finn
While this has nothing to do with confidence, I just wanted to point out the insight Finn has, despite his dumb jock image. Not everyone realizes that girls do this, but maybe he has seen Quinn or his mom do this enough that he has caught on to our ways.

"I have enough confidence to say out loud that what happened between us in the auditorium was real. You have feelings for me and you just don't have the guts to admit it." - Rachel
The bullying that Rachel faces at school would be enough to kill the confidence of any high school student, but this girl is so sure of herself (sometimes bordering on unknowingly arrogant) that she can maintain her confidence in the face of social hierarchy. Finn is not comfortable enough in his own skin to defy high school social conventions by facing the truth. I have yet to be as confident as Rachel. Only within the past couple years have I been able to talk to and make friends with the "popular" kids - and it's usually because they are so confident in themselves they don't realize the social divide when they start talking to me.

"Am I hurting your feelings? Did I say something wrong? Because I thought you wanted somebody who respected you enough to tell you the truth. But maybe you don't have the confidence to hear it. Maybe you need somebody who's going to lie to you and tell you things like, 'You've got what it takes.'" - Dakota Stanley, champion choreographer
In a way, Dakota is right. I would rather have someone respect me enough to tell me the truth instead of feeding me lies. And it does take a bit of confidence in yourself not to take remarks too personally. When someone critiques my art work, I have to remember that they are not necessarily criticizing me. The lines become blurry with the art form of dance, where the artist is the art. However, there's a difference between constructive criticism and insult. If I only heard insults, which are damaging to the individual, I would never develop enough confidence to handle the criticism.

"It's never too late to grow a pair and go after your dreams." - Will's dad
What dreams do you want to go after? Mine may have something to do with the pair of pointe shoes sitting underneath my bed.

Mercedes: You shouldn't be ashamed of who you are, Kurt... The whole point of the club is about expressing what's really inside you, remember?
Kurt: I can't. I'm just not that confident, I guess.
Expressing what's inside of you takes a lot of guts, because you risk the rejection of your true self. It's just fascinating (and not uncommon) how someone like Kurt, who seems so confident on the outside, can be so insecure on the inside.

"When you really believe in yourself, you don't have to bring other people down." - Quinn
Whether or not she would like to admit it, Sue Sylvester doubts her ability to outdo the glee club and tries to take them down in order to secure her superiority. It's like what we've always learned - bullies are just insecure and need to put everyone down in order to feel better about themselves. Those who believe in themselves see no need for comparison, no need to be superior. Kurt, held captive by social hierarchy, copes with his insecurity by telling himself he is superior to everyone else, when in reality (according to Finn) everyone is a loser.

*Last week's post was rather lengthy, so from here on out I plan on only including meaningful quotes or ones that relate to the episode theme (word of the day).

Glee Episode #2: Showmance

Word of the day: Compromise. This episode, everyone wants it. Others don't really understand what it means.

Finn: Let me help you with that.
Rachel: Thanks Finn. You're so chivalrous.
Finn: Thanks! That's a good thing, right?
Yes, Finn is rather chivalrous. I was really impressed that he would help Rachel in public, because that could definitely damage his reputation. I guess he is starting to settle into his own without fear of what others think, but it is still a challenge for him.

"One day, you will all work for me." - Kurt Hummel
It looks like Kurt is beginning to stand up for himself, and maybe one day he won't end up inside the dumpster.

Quinn: Let's compromise. If you quit the club, I'll let you touch my breast.
Finn: Under the shirt?
Quinn: Over the bra.
Finn: No, no. I can't. I want to do Glee. I'm really happy when I perform.
Congrats to Finn for choosing Glee over some booty. Also, it wasn't until now that I realized the couple is "Finn & Quinn" - and it just sounds ridiculous. Couple's names shouldn't rhyme.

"You try to bust my face again, and I will cut you." - Mercedes
I can only think of Bon Qui Qui when I hear that phrase. And that automatically makes it awesome.

"You are not giving up your craft room, Terri. A mother needs her respite. That craft room is the only thing that is going to keep you from going all Susan Smith on that little angel. Post partum runs in our family." - Kendra
I can't decide who is worse - Terri or Kendra? It looks like being plain crazy runs in their family too.

Kendra: Where are you going?
Kendra's Husband: Bathroom? All that bran.
Kendra: No, you can't. Kyle needs his inhaler.
Whipped. Let's hope that Will is better at growing a backbone. At least Will's character has a name and the guts to expose his wife's Christmas Closet.

"This banister was made by Ecuadorian children." - Real Estate Agent
Is that the big selling point these days? Nothing says luxury like child labor.

"My very own Sophie's Choice. Fine, I'm going to give up the sun nook for the grand foyer. But I really need the polished door handles." - Terri
Great analogy, Terri. Having to choose which pointless luxury to give up is just like making a life or death decision in a Nazi concentration camp. At least she is getting a taste of compromise - a house with no sun nook, but a grand foyer.

"Communication is the foundation of any successful music group. If we're going to succeed, we need to communicate." - Will
Communication is key to any relationship, musical or not. Will's marriage could use some honest communication.

Emma: Rachel, did you just throw up?
Rachel: No.
Emma: You missed the toilet.
Rachel: The girl who was throwing up before me left that. I tried, but I guess I just don't have a gag reflex.
Emma: One day when you're older that will turn out to be a gift. Let's have a little chat, okay?
I didn't get this until the second time I watched it. Oh my, Emma.

"Have you ever liked somebody so much you just want to lock yourself in your room, turn on sad music and cry?" - Rachel
I prefer my car, and listening to Marie Digby's "Better Off Alone".

"You need to remember, Rachel, to protect your heart. I don't care who he is, if he doesn't like you for the way you are, if he's married with a baby on the way. That's not worth the heartache. You don't want to compromise yourself for that... um..." - Emma
"Above all else, guard your heart, for it is the wellspring of life." - Proverbs 4:23

"Santana Lopez bent over in hers one day, and I swear I could see her ovaries." - Puck
Does Puck know what ovaries are, or did he have to look them up?

"This dance ain't for errbody. Only the sexy people." - Artie, during the performance of "Push It"
I laughed out loud when he said this. Maybe it's something about a nerdy white guy with glasses saying "errbody".

"That was the most offensive thing I've seen in 20 years of teaching. And that includes an elementary school production of Hair." - Sue
How an elementary school was able to do a musical about the sexual revolution, I do not know. My elementary school was only able to do the first act of "Into the Woods" because Act II was a bit off limits.

"My first thought was that your students should be put into foster care." - Sue

"I'm a good man, Emma. I'll treat you right, put up with your crazy. They can't fire me because I'm a minority, so I'll always be able to provide for you. You can't do much worse." - Ken Tanaka
Ken Tanaka is growing on me. He's not the skeezeball he was in the first episode, and I think he really likes Emma. I hope she has a good time at Tulipalooza.

Finn: I looked under the bed to make sure you weren't hanging out under there. But then I heard you sing. I don't know how to say this, but it touched something in me. Right here.
Rachel: Your heart is on the other side of your chest.
Finn: It's beating really hard.
So. Cute. Cue the swooning of women everywhere.

"It's not all about you, or, I realized, about me." - Will
I just hope Will realizes it can be about him sometimes, and doesn't let Terri have her way all the time.

From the Top

It's tough to choose, but I think the premiere I anticipate the most this fall is Glee. Especially after FOX aired the Director's cut of the pilot episode on Wednesday, I am excited to see what else Ryan Murphy and the other creative geniuses behind the show have in store for us. The music is fantastic, and the characters are entertaining. The script is so funny and witty that I couldn't help but online battle with my friend while watching the show - who would be the first to IM the upcoming line? Recently I posted a quote from the Pilot as my facebook status and generated response from other Glee fans who readily recognized the quote. This has given me some inspiration for a weekly blog feature where I will post some of my favorite quotes from the episode along with some commentary. This will most likely appear each Thursday, though I can't make any promises!

Here's post #1: "Pilot"

"You think this is hard?
- Try being waterboarded. That's hard. (The very first line of the entire series!)
- I'm living with hepatitis. That's hard.
Sue Sylvester, coach of the Cheerios cheerleading squad, sure knows how to motivate her "performers." I'm pretty sure this will be a recurring element of the series, and I'm definitely okay with that. I can't wait to see what unconventional bits of inspiration Sue will share next. I'm thinking positive reinforcement is not really her style.

Kurt: [As the football team prepares to throw him into the dumpster] Wait, this is Marc Jacobs' new collection.
Finn: Wait. [Kurt takes off his Marc Jacobs jacket and hands it to Finn] Okay. [Kurt meets the inside of the dumpster as Finn drops his gaze, a bit ashamed]
Oh, the first glimpse of Finn's struggling high school persona. Will he be the good guy who defends the underdog? Or will he go along with the bullying antics of his fellow football players because that's what everyone expects of him? I suppose both - or neither - depending on how you classify the middle ground of compromise.

"By its very definition, Glee is about opening yourself up to joy" - Lillian Adler, former director of the Glee Club at William McKinley High School
Glee, the show, is also about opening yourself up to joy, I think. There is something very heartwarming about watching the underdog find victory, and that seems to be the very essence of the show. It's not so much about the music as it is about this group of social outcasts trying to find their place. I also like this quote, because glee or joy doesn't just happen. We cannot experience even the most inherent happiness without allowing ourselves to be receptive to it.

"Your resentment... is delicious. Well, I have a phoner in a couple minutes. It's an interview - on the telephone with a major media outlet. I'll probably do it on my iPhone." - Sue Sylvester
This quote just embodies Sue's superiority complex. Not only does she think the Cheerios are better than any other group on campus because of their success and high standings in teenage social hierarchy, she also finds herself personally superior to her colleagues. I think we all know at least one person like that who is a chronic "one up"-er.

"My gold stars are a metaphor for me - being a star." - Rachel Berry
Rachel is quite the focused young woman, with definite goals and dreams, and the talent to achieve what she wants. But such focus comes at a price, leaving her painfully naive and socially inept - and apparently unable to construct a strong metaphor.

"But Will, I'm on my feet four hours a day, three times a week here." - Terri Schuester
Terri, the wife you just love to hate. This scene at Sheets and Things only begins to show us the kind of selfishness Will has to put up with/ignore in his marriage to Terri. It's the kind of selfishness that makes me wonder if Terri is really pregnant, or if it's one gigantic lie to keep Will on a short leash.

Sue: High school is a caste system. Kids fall into certain slots. Your jocks, your popular kids - up in the penthouse. The invisibles and the kids playing live-action druids and trolls out in the forest, bottom floor.
Will: And where do the Glee kids lie?
Sue: Sub-basement.
High school is definitely a caste system. There is, without a doubt, a social ladder to climb. I've always been the kind of person who hung out in the middle, not particularly finding favor with the popular kids but not facing their cruelty either. I probably thought I was fortunate to be above "sub-basement", but never treated them poorly because I was only a floor away from playing live-action druids.

"I have trouble with things like that. The messy things." - Emma
She's a germophobe who struggles with "the messy things." Yet what can be messier than unrequited love for a married co-worker who is about to become a father?

"Dr. Phil said that people can change. You know, it's not a bad thing to want a real life, Will. And to have a glue gun that works!" - Terri
Of course Dr. Phil wasn't speaking to her... Her materialism is almost painful.

"I like somebody else, alright? Nothing I can do about it because they're unavailable, so I have to deal with that..." - Emma
Who hasn't been there? Hopefully "dealing with it" means getting over him and not becoming a home-wrecker.

"Wait. Let's pray." - Quinn Fabray, girlfriend of Finn and president of the celibacy club, taking a break from making out with Finn
Whenever there's a Christian character on TV, I'm not sure how to feel about it. Sometimes they're super naive like Grace Bowman from Secret Life of the American Teenager. If not, they're a hypocrite like Quinn, who hosts "Christ Crusader" meetings at her house one minute and makes life miserable for Rachel the next. I haven't decided which stereotype is more frustrating, but I know characters like Quinn make it necessary for Christians to live lives of love and compassion.

"Being an adult is about having to make difficult choices." - Will
I think I will be feeling more like an adult soon...

"I'll miss you." - Will, to Emma
The completely wrong thing for a man to say to the single woman who is desperately in love with him...

"We're all losers... I'm not afraid of being called a loser, because I can accept that's what I am. But I am afraid of turning my back on something that actually made me happy for the first time in my sorry life." - Finn
I wish high school was full of people like Finn. It would make the world a better place. He's the guy you love to love, and the guy you don't mind being popular, because he's not only nice to look at but he's beautiful on the inside too.

"But provide what exactly? The understanding that money is the most important thing - or the idea that the only life worth living is one that you're really passionate about, Will?" - Emma
Wow. One of the best lines of the episode, in my opinion. It really got me thinking about the job options I have, and what my choice says about me. What would I find in a life I'm really passionate about?

"You might think that all the boys at school would totally want to tap this, but my Myspace schedule keeps me way too busy to date." - Rachel
"There is nothing ironic about show choir." - Rachel
"I want the agony out of your eyes!" - Sue
"Chicks don't have prostates. I looked it up." - Puck
These are just classic.

Check out my blog on Thursday for quotes from episode 2, "Showmance".